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  • Live alone, or with others?

    In order to be prepared, I figured it’s time to start thinking about our future living situation.

    I’m not going to head up a flat again. So that leaves moving into an established house, or setting up on our own again.

    I am leaning towards the former, but of course there are pitfalls. I think I’m a decent flatty. I’m clean and fairly quiet although I do have my antisocial spells. BF on the other hand can alienate some people – whereas I can’t help but be courteous to others in general, even if I dislike them, he won’t do that; he’s too honest. He gets dirty from work which might annoy flatmates, and is not as tidy as me – although it’s hard to tell to what extent, considering how we live at the moment (but I think I can guess how much of the mess around here is caused by him).

    Cons of living with others:
    Can be kicked out at their whim
    Cooking times can be awkward
    Cleaning can always be an issue even in the smoothest running households
    Risk of having psycho flatmates
    Issues with having friends over
    Issues with their friends
    Conflicting morning routines
    Paying for others’ power/internet guzzling
    Limited fridge space

    Cons of living by ourselves:
    Can be isolated (although I’m pretty introverted)
    More expensive ?
    Expensive bond, totally responsible for condition of house
    Less space (although less to clean)
    Nobody wants to rent to a couple of 20 year olds, esp. with one of them still studying, no matter how good of a job they may have.

  • Strange coincidence

    lasertx3
    Oddly enough, the same weekend we got robbed, my family went up to Whangarei and had their car stolen. In Whangarei. Of all places! A 20year old Ford Laser; hard a WRX or RX7. The police even reckoned they knew who probably did it (okay, bad grammar alert)

    The friends they stayed with were kind enough to drive them back to Auckland, luckily, and were even nice enough to send back $20 for me. They don’t even know me! The wife met me once. Husband wouldn’t know me from a stray dog. But I appreciated it very much. Unromantic as it is, and as much like my mother as it sounds, I really do think money is the best gift of all (well, except when it’s form your significant other). I’m sure I’ll think  differently when I’m well off and more established in life, but for now that’s the cold truth.

    Is it just an Asian thing? I must find out. Rellies always give small amounts of money on visits, it’s sort of the done thing. I’ve never really thought to ask anyone else. What’s also nice is she’s Asian and he’s Scottish, and the reason I think it’s nice is sure, I know tons of mixed race couples and often see random ones around (and occasionally their adorable offspring, whom I stare at) but I know of none who are married. It’s not like I need validation. I just think it’s nice. It sets a precedent for me, maybe? And hopefully if the whanau like those two maybe they won’t take it too hard when I marry a big white westie.

  • A parallel tax plan?

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    Roger Douglas’s brainchild

    It’s a really interesting proposal. I don’t know jack about economics – just last year I learned that the OCR is the benchmark for interest rates and when it goes up, savers benefit and when it goes down, borrowers benefit (still, at least i know what it IS, which is more than I can say for others) – but on the surface it doesn’t sound that bad. Of course, I have no idea what paying for healthcare would cost. If it’s anything like over the in States, give me high taxes any day. I figure you’re responsible for your own retirement savings anyway. I guess the biggest worry for low income earners would be the lack of a welfare net. People like me don’t have a large EF to fall back on. There’s no safety net to catch us. And that’s a scary thought.

  • Not a democracy

    university is not a democracy.

    the one thing I despise about AUT is their policy on timetables. at least, within the communications faculty. they assign our classes. we take them. we can try and swap classes with other students of our own accord, sign forms, etc. it’s not always easy though, when you’re trying to pawn off an 8-10am media comm tutorial – people were resorting to monetarial bribes last year! Strangely, haven’t seen any such requests this year.

    i’m just waiting to hear back about my two shorthand classes to finalise my schedule. they run 8-10am, tuesday through friday. unfortunately, the only two days where i DON’T already have a class in that block, are wednesday and thursday. so unless that gets changed, my shorthand classes will be on wed/thur – only problem is I have a four hour class lined up from 10-2 on wednesdays. Making 6 hours straight, 8-2.

    please, kill me now!

    four hours of photography last year on friday afternoons was painful enough, despite my love of the subject, the 2pm short break and that we were allowed to leave early (it was very much self directed). so I can’t imagine how shorthand followed by news reporting is gonna be.

    i can’t wait to finish and be shot of their undemocratic scheduling. and to NEVER have to deal with studylink again. or have six hours straight of classes.

    i do, however, plan to write a lovely letter to the scholarships office thanking them for my fortune and allowing me to graduate debt free. see, i’m no pessimist. silver lining!

  • Paying by Visa

    asb1

    I expected to be $84 poorer tonight after calling up AMI and taking up our contents insurance policy. I could technically have put the annual $307 on my Visa, but I’d rather pay quarterly and have the money for it. The guy on the phone said they prefer to direct debit quarterly payments, either from a bank account or credit card. Nuh uh.

    Not going there. Hate direct debits, don’t trust them. With a passion. I once had a direct debit arrangement with a power company. They billed me an extra bill even after the date I told them I was moving out and to transfer the bill into the name of a flatmate who was remaining in the house. Never got that money back from the person. It was only $50 or 60, but enough to be annoyed about.

    I also had to have a direct debit for paying off my bed – which since the 1st of Feb, is officially paid off!!! One less payment going out of my account every week. I’m glad that went smoothly; I was afraid they’d continue to bill me and I’d have to call them up irately. I also don’t like the fact that student loan payments are now being deducted straight from my pay. AFTER TAX. Not even any benefits there. I am pretty close to a zero balance now, so again I hope they’re onto it and stop deductions once it’s paid. I am worried, knowing how govt. bureaucracy goes, that they’ll continue to take money because I owed for the 2008 year. Given that the amount I owed basically equalled the remaining balance, it’s kind of a moot point. But deductions coming out of my pay would be deducted against the 2009 year, and I wouldn’t be surprised if they insisted I still owed $673 for 2008…and continued to take money from me, and then send me a letter saying “you have overpaid, send us your account number to get your refund”.

    Sigh.

    I do not like the idea of giving someone else access, no matter how limited, to my bank account LET ALONE my Visa. Especially when that company does not send out reminders before the debit occurs. Not saying that’s necessary, or even that they’re obligated to. I just think it’s a courtesy – my old power company informed me every month a week in advance, so I don’t see why another company can’t do it quarterly?

    Anyway, as BF’s car insurance is with them, they’re sending me the paperwork and an invoice in the mail. Hopefully I can pay it by Visa at a branch and push my rewards balance over $12. then I’ll decide what to do with that money. I won’t be surprised if that incurs like a 3% charge, though – or if it’s not allowed at all. It always bugs me that I can’t pay my utilities at the post office by Visa. That’s around $300 I’m missing out on every month = valuable reward points! I could always direct debit my bills, but I like to be in control of my money, and I don’t care if I’m being paranoid – would you give a stranger the key to your back door?

  • Home is my haven…or hell

    Why, oh why did I sign a nine month lease?

    I am now stuck here for another six months.

    Why? Let me try and remember so I don’t feel like a total dumbass.

    I didn’t want to move, AGAIN, not till the end of year anyway.

    I’d made it through almost a year here and thought I could hack another one.

    Rent couldn’t be raised within this period.

    Um, yeah.

    Then we got broken into, and my tolerance for the intolerable flatmate deteriorated even further.

    I clean up his messes. That’s the thing, living with someone with low (or no) standards of hygiene and cleanliness. It gets to the point where I just can’t stand it, and do it. I no longer ask him to do ANYTHING. There is no point. Once every few months I lose it and he does a load of dishes or so. And then deliberately, pointedly, mentions to me “Did you see I did the dishes?” Like he deserves a gold star. Like that even begins to make up for all the chores he hasn’t done since we moved in. Although, my period between freakouts is decreasing. More like every month or so. I will go into the kitchen or out the back door and stand there and fume, or cry, and feel a breakdown coming on. Usually I then exchange terse words with BF, and end up storming out and going for a very long, angry walk.

    I will never be a head of a flat again. I’m not cut out for it. I can’t stand the chasing money, the cleaning up after everyone else’s drinking/parties, the general cleaning, the being painted as an evil bitch for trying to maintain a semblance of cleanliness and hygiene in the house.

    I just don’t understand. I understand that vacuuming, sweeping and mopping are not priorities for some. But how, when I so frequently go around cleaning various rooms and picking up assorted crap, can said flatmate not even offer to help? It’s even better when he asks “what I’m doing?” No, he simply steps around me, even making me feel like I have to apologise for getting in his way. He often slips on the wet floor when I’ve been mopping. No sympathy from me.

    There are only so many times I can pick up milk bottles, juice packets, chicken bones, greasy bakery bags and mandarin peels from all over the house before I totally lose it. Living with other people is not the same as living with your mother. There must be compromise. By no means do I expect to have anything resembling a clean house. No, that’s a pipe dream while we live here. I want everyone to pick up after themselves – a seemingly simple, basic ask. I don’t expect things done up to my standards or within what I might call an acceptable timeframe. But they need to be done, AT SOME POINT. Which they never are, unless I do it myself. Why do I have to wait until he feels like it, or gets around to it (which is just  a fob off?) Why should he not get up and pick up three day old food scraps rather than leaving them festering for months?

    He does not: do dishes, wipe up spills, put food scraps / rubbish in the bin, clean the stove, clean the oven, clean the fridge or clear out his smelly food cupboard, take out bottles for recycling, take out rubbish, take out bins, clean the toilet or shower, sweep or mop, vacuum, clean up after shaving,  clean up his cigarette butts, or clean up the remains of the vomit he spattered down his bedroom and our lounge windows.

    In short, he does nothing but exist. He lives here, makes messes everywhere he goes, and leaves them where they are.

    How hard is it to show a little respect to those who live with you? When you break things, replace them – like my guitar strings, our large bowls, BF’s prized Jack Daniels glasses – as unbreakable as glass can get, but they couldn’t withstand the forces of evil flatmate. (Probably impossible to replace, as they came with a special Christmas hamper) There are piles of dirty dishes in his room. My dishes. Over half of our bowls have gone missing, even taking into account the stacks he has accumulated. I have nothing to eat my cereal out of in the mornings.

    He has always paid rent on time, the one redeeming feature he has. Bills, on the other hand, have fallen behind.

    Finding another flatmate? I dread the thought. And doubt the feasibility of actually finding a willing soul.

    Ah, sigh. End rant.

  • Advertising

    I really don’t like sponsored posts. I find it really annoying when I go to read an article that sounds promising (ie, something about shopping online, or treating blackheads, shall we say) and it only offers generic tips with the advice to use various products from a certain brand (Westpac, Clean and Clear).

    Even worse: I saw an advice column on a certain website, touted as being the place to ask all your skincare questions. Every answer pointed the reader towards one Clean and Clear product or another. Blatant much?

    How is that useful to anybody? Well, slightly, maybe. But generally, we want unbiased information – we don’t want advertorial, especially unmarked advertorial. Our suburban newspapers have the courtesy to place “Advertising feature” at the head of such pages. Some upmarket magazines don’t though, and disguise paid placement as editorial. You have to look a second time to work it out. I think that’s sneaky, and I don’t like it.

  • Flashbacks

    Memories. They’re funny things, aren’t they? For me at least, I don’t actually have many memories at all, and they tend to be pretty vague. And the things I’d rather forget, well, they tend to be the ones that linger and crop at the most random times – like today at the BK drive thru.

    I guess by now it’s obvious my relationship with the parentals is uneasy. I’m sure it will ease as I get older. For now, I still get flashbacks to certain things, like being called (not quite in so many words, she couldn’t quite bring herself to say “prostitute”) a prostitute for hugging my (x)BF in public. Or being chastised for choosing photography as a subject “what will you do when he dumps you, eh?” Or in an effort to get me away from perceived bad influences and sort me out, suggesting a trip to the Gold Coast (which never materialised, incidentally) – “but can you be away from a boy for a day?” You might think this implied I was boycrazy but no, this referred to x(BF), whose name would not be uttered in the house. Yes, that’s how crazy my parents were, and how little they thought of me – I still cannot believe she thought that, oh, I don’t know, I might combust or have a breakdown or something should I be parted from him for longer than 24 hours. Sure, we spent pretty much everyday together. But why not? What do school age couples do? If we had been unable to for whatever reason, then we wouldn’t have. Like on days one of us was sick. Whatever.

    And being chastised for dating someone I ‘wasn’t sure I wanted to marry’. And having plans to travel in life which I may or may not have shared. Leading him on. And this all somehow implying that I had suddenly lost all ambition and would droo out, never go to uni, get married by 20 and presumably pop out some sprogs and go on the DPB.

    Time has dimmed those memories, but I guess I still hold a trace of bitterness.