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Month: February 2012

  • February 15, 2012

    Finding your healthy balance

    I don’t drink coffee, and I don’t smoke. I rarely drink alcohol, energy drinks or fizzy drinks; I don’t eat lollies, and I’m not big on meat.

    Fresh vegetables are important components of a...

    Image via Wikipedia

    That said, I’m a fiend for sugar in most other forms (baked goods and anything chocolate), carbs and many fried foods. And I’ll confess to a weakness for Yum Yum shrimp-flavoured noodles.

    I walk to and from work every day (20 minutes each way). I usually run twice a week (anywhere from one to 15km at a time) although this month I’ve been replacing one run with Zumba – one of my good friends is teaching free classes at Rocket Park in Mt Albert every Wednesday from 6.30pm if you’re keen.

    As with most things in life, I could do more. I could exercise every day. I could give up meat entirely or go vegan. (In theory. I love cheese and yoghurt too much to seriously contemplate the latter.)

    But I’m happy.

    What’s right for me and my body may not be right for anybody else.

    I’m one of those hateful thin people who can eat whatever she wants, so weight loss has never been a tangible motivator for me. (Apparently it’s okay for people to yell backhanded compliments at me while I’m out pounding the pavement.) I’m still yet to achieve my goal of giving blood because of my weight. So it’s got to be all me, all internally driven.

    I run to tone up and because somewhere along the way, I realised that between the panting, air-sucking and burning in my lungs, sweating it out physically felt good. I’m not saying it’s easy. But it’s worth it.

    Maybe I’m not a serious runner in some eyes because I can wear $20 Warehouse trainers and get away with it, and sometimes I only head out for a 15-minute jog. I’m okay with that – with admitting I really have no motivation to get my sweat on more often.

    I eat dessert almost every single day. And I usually have home-baked something or other for a snack at work. I still, more often than not, fail to make 5+ a day. I don’t like very many fruits and I prefer my vegetables cooked – and I need my carbs in order to keep my ridiculously fast metabolism up so I’m not scrounging around for more food every half hour. I’ve learned to like greens about 1000 times more than I did two years ago, but plant matter alone inevitably leaves me feeling hollow before long.

    Right now, this is my life. This is what my balance looks like.

  • February 14, 2012

    Find a girl who…

    blogs. She will chronicle all the milestones – and the mundane – of your life together for posterity.

    plays the guitar. One day she might actually play in front of your friends, or write you a corny song (misery offers far more original and infinite inspiration). And you’ll have a talking point on your overseas travels.

    sings to herself. Because life is just too short not to.

    runs. You know she will return to you, as long as a return is merited.

    eats. Because food is the greatest love language of all.

    (Last year’s Valentine post is here.)

     

  • February 11, 2012

    Link love (Powered by gravel roads and introspection)

    This is Tane Mahuta, the largest kauri tree ever and a few thousand years old.

    Have to say, heightwise, it wasn’t all that impressive – but at something like a 13-metre girth, that is one doublewide tree. Pity there’s no track circling the perimenter – that would be fun to run around.

    Last weekend was a whirlwind around the north. Kai Iwi Lakes (not as impressive as I hoped. Possibly because it was an overcast day?) where my friend and I went for a quick dip and attempted to get on the water swing. Yes, there was a pair of swings situated out in the big lake. You would never see that in Auckland. Sadly, we both lacked the upper body strength to hoist ourselves up properly – and the boys opted to stay on dry land. We settled for flopping briefly like planks on the seats before sliding back off amid uncontrollable fits of laughter. Then a series of other beaches, never actually staying very long at one – again, the weather, and also because our hosts apparently don’t like to stay put in one place.

    How’s that for a secluded beach?

    Now, before we get to the links, be sure to head on over to Daisy’s blog. Why? My Friday Five confessions post continues to be one of my most popular (and most commented on) of all time. So I’m pleased to share a bit of a redux, this time as a guest on When Life Gives You Lemons.

    WORK

    Michelle Minkoff offers some lessons learned on being a great mentor.

    Molly’s boss – aka, the son – doesn’t like to wear pants.

    Lisa’s Foods shares four lessons learned from working retail.

    Susannah Breslin’s tips for getting started as a freelancer.

    A Yes and Yes reader special on giving up a lifelong career dream.

    Financial Samurai outlines the upsides of being average.

    MONEY

    Melissa Wilson explains how she made it through university debt free.

    Finding financial accord as a couple, via Bucksome Boomer.

    Prairie Eco Thrifter on the economics of choosing vacation days.

    LIFE

    Well Heeled is bang on with all her observations about the traps of adult life.

    An outstanding APW post on families, surnames and all that jazz. I can totally relate to everything in this post, except the coin toss part (I’m at the stage where I am happy for our kids to have his name – I don’t care about that – but I’m keeping my own).

    Fabulously Broke outlines a bunch of great waysto make old clothes look new.

    There will always be someone out there better than you. And that’s okay. Via Yes and Yes.

  • February 10, 2012

    Worst case scenario

    I find it strangely comforting sometimes to contemplate what I’d do if I lost my job.

    The very first step I’d take is try to pull together a patchwork of jobs to get some income coming in – and I definitely would have a couple of industry starting points from which I might get a few hours a week. And depending on the circumstances, freelance work for my company might also be an option.

    I wouldn’t qualify for unemployment, so I suppose we’d tighten up our already firm belts even more in regard to food and entertainment. That’s because I have a partner, and too much in savings (I *think* you have to be down to your last thousand or so but I could be wrong on that). Which leads me to ask – do you think it’s right to collect unemployment, if you could, even if you didn’t need it?

    That aside, I would seriously consider taking some time out to do some extended travelling, depending on my bank balance and T’s work situation. It’s not my preferred MO, but in a situation like that, I might just change my mind.

    Otherwise, I’d be reaching out to contacts at my previous company, and throughout the industry at large. It’s a small field, so I know someone at most of the major players. I might contact some editors directly, and if I was thinking about changing tacks, possibly approach other organisations that interest me (in banking, education or more generally creative endeavours beyond publishing).

    Given my interest in money and personal finance, it might seem like finance writer would be a logical next step. Women’s mags often have a money column (usually done by one of a couple of media-savvy financial coaches), Diana Clement’s Herald column sometimes yields interesting stuff but by and large is pretty unexciting – interest.co.nz‘s personal finance editor Amanda Morrall probably has the most interesting job. But to be honest, most topics have been clubbed to death and trampled all over. I’m much more interested – and always have been – in personal journeys. Maybe I could brainstorm potential approaches during my funemployed days.

    I’d also definitely consider two things I would not have a couple of years ago: opportunities in Wellington, because the city is just so darn cool, and contract jobs. I used to think of fixed-term contracts as offering no security – but really, if they paid well enough and the work was right, contracting can make for a decent lifestyle and afford you more time to travel.

    Do you ever consider what you’d do in the event of a job loss? If you were eligible for unemployment benefits but didn’t need them, would you take them?

  • February 9, 2012

    Things I don’t (and won’t) pay for

    Books

    English: Cinema 4 at HOYTS, Forest Hill Shoppi...

    Image via Wikipedia

    I could not live without books. But I don’t care to own them, and even free ones are just clutter to me – they get passed on or donated. I’m a lifelong library lover, myself, and I can think of only a tiny handful of books I might actually want to possess (none of which I do).

    Movies at the cinema

    Perhaps it’s cheating, but I pretty much only go to movies on reward dollars earned from using my CC. (But I’m not *spending* anything in doing so!) I also get to go to the odd free screening through work. With regular tickets now costing something like $16, prices are just insane.

    Hair removal

    I have to admit I am lucky in that I’m pretty hairless (especially as I’m dark-haired). I use T’s cast-off razors (which sounds disgusting, I know, but he only uses them once or twice each) and plain old soap. Wouldn’t work for everyone, though.

    Conditioner

    I have the greasiest mane in the world. It really doesn’t need it. I rotate shampoos a lot and sometimes get two in one shampoo/conditioner; otherwise, if the ends really are dry, a spot of oil (coconut or olive) rubbed into the ends suffices.

    Lunchboxes and ziplock bags

    We do have a few proper tupperware type lunchboxes, but otherwise I rely on plastic takeaway containers and ice cream cartons. Ziplock bags, I wash out when we use them to get nuts or lollies from the supermarket bulk bins.

    Glass and oven cleaner

    The things you can do with vinegar and baking soda are boundless.

    Bank fees

    My account is entirely free because I no longer receive paper statements. I rarely use ATMs, and if I do, I hunt out ones that belong to my bank in particular (T does generally run on cash though, and unfortunately isn’t as nutty as I am about only sticking to own-bank ATMs). Credit card fees are a given, but more than paid for through the rebates I earn just for using it.

    Delivery charges

    It’s almost always cheaper to get in the car and drive out yourself to pick up food. (Maybe it’s different overseas.)

    And there are plenty of other things I won’t pay full price for – DVD rentals, facials/massages, skincare. There’s just no reason to, between daily deal sites, discount sales, coupons and mystery shops.

    What things do you refuse to fork out for?

  • February 7, 2012

    Tuesday Three: Totally overrated foods

    English: Four Bubble Tea drinks from the Teaho...

    Image via Wikipedia

    Bubble tea/ Milk tea / Pearl tea / Whatever the hell you call it

    I know, I know. I’m Asian. Blasphemy, right? But there’s nothing good in my books about this stuff. The creepy, rubbery balls. Tea itself (I prefer tea to coffee but that’s not saying much). The weird flavour combinations. Give me a milk shake any day.

    Oysters.

    Ick. This is the only seafood I can think of that I turn my nose up at. It’s like the tofu of the ocean. The smell! The texture! And think of the poor baby oysters from Alice in Wonderland!

    Any candy that’s not straight chocolate

    Now look, nobody would ever deny that I have a sweet tooth. Health aside, I could easily exist on the two food groups of carbs and dessert. But I’ve never liked lollies. Kids would scramble to the corner dairy after getting their allowance to buy up packets of jet planes and milk bottles after school. I never did (plus, I only got an allowance for a few months). I like my food to look edible, not processed, plastic lollies. And who came up with the concept of fruit rollups?

    What foods are overhyped in your book?

  • February 5, 2012

    Link love (Powered by bike rides and Brandon Boyd)

    I have two February food resolutions:

    • Put more salt on my food. Cramps suck.
    • Eat more salads for lunch. Am spending too much time standing over a stove.

    In other news, I saw Incubus live this week and have no regrets. Here’s a review that more or less sums it up perfectly.

    I’ll admit, I don’t listen to the radio anymore, and haven’t for years, so I knew nothing about their new album. Turns out I really like one of the songs – Isadore – which I had to identify the next day off this set list.

    My only complaint lies with the audience, not the band. I honestly think I may prefer dealing with rough, pushy guys at the kinds of gigs I’m used to.This time around I had to contend with getting hair in my mouth from the girl in front of me, and several other girls piercing my eardrums with their constant shrill screams.

    The gig itself was somewhat stripped back, almost intimate. Definitely a concert and not a show (unlike the Foos). That said, they have plenty of powerful songs as well as mellow ones. Opener Megalomanic and closer Wish You Were Here were suitably explosive, as was one of my favourites, Anna Molly. Then there were the likes of Pardon Me and Love Hurts, and oldies Drive and Are You In which really took all of us back.

    I could only have wished for Agoraphobia, my fave song (but I don’t think it was a single), and maybe Talk Shows on Mute, which I used not to like but has grown on me since I started learning to play it. (Speaking of which, I went right home and successfully learned Drive, which was quite satisfying considering I still remember trying and failing on my chunky acoustic when I first started playing six years ago).

    End ramble.

    WORK

    At Kalzumeus, a long read (but worth a skim) on salary negotiation, with a special focus on engineers.

    Overcoming Bias voices something I wonder about – fresh grads straight out of business school going into consulting companies with no actual experience.

    Business for Good explains how to network via Facebook.

    Teacher Finance lays out the pros and cons of the job.

    Carol Tice breaks down how to earn six figures as a freelance writer.

    Don’t count on making a career out of social media, at Zombie Journalism.

    Fabulously Broke tackles the blue vs white collar tension and points out that it’s a symbiotic relationship.

    MONEY

    Automating savings on an irregular income, at Get Rich Slowly.

    Everyday Minimalist asks: Why do you buy?

    Thousandaire on financial behaviours that piss him off, and why you should write off your charitable donations  (Totally agree. I ended up saving my tiny tax refund from my charity donations late last year because it was a tight month, but ended up making a big donation last month, so really I think it evened out.)

    FOOD

    Love it! Uncooking – a super simple way to plan meals, at Stonesoup.

    I probably won’t make these potato chip cookies but am intrigued nonetheless…

    And Minting Nickels shares her favourite pizza dough recipe.

    LIFE AND EVERYTHING ELSE

    When should you be airing your complaints on social media? Via Grow.

    At Small Hands, Big Ideas, some handy online tools for almost everything in life (see my favourite apps here)

    Kyla Roma shares some insights into making and keeping goals.

    At 20 and Engaged, some suggestions for practical wedding favours.

    Twelve ways to tap into your inner bliss, by Jenny Blake.

  • February 4, 2012

    What we spent: January 2012

    ** Click here for more info on my monthly spending roundups.**

    Some notes:

    Car maintenance – oil and stuff. Or maybe it was just oil. Can’t quite recall. Let’s just say fluids and be done with it.

    Clothes and grooming – shirts and singlets for T, and a lipstick for me ahead of my no-beauty spend year. I also just got given a big jar of Elizabeth Arden cream, so am well and truly set.

    Dining – $17 over budget. Hmm.

    Donations – I know it’s not much, but it’s the most I’ve donated in a month yet. This was a cause I’ve long been meaning to patron and this was the minimum donation. In Aussie bucks, no less.

    Entertainment– $30 for a hosted family lunch, $20 ice skating, $10 at the arcade, and $80 for Incubus. I know said no concerts this year unless the Chilis come, but decided at last minute (two days before) to do it. Why? I had a $100 Ticketmaster voucher I originally planned to use it to tick off my goal of going to the theatre but there are no good shows coming up and it expires in five months. This way, we only paid $80 for two. (Though if the RHCP do tour this way, I am not entirely sure I really care to see a post-Frusciante band.)

    Groceries – We came back from our holiday on the 2nd, so really it was a five-week month. Not too shabby.

    Holidays – $64 deposit for a campervan for our South Island trip (post coming up on that), and the rest was food and petrol toward the end of our trip over NYE.

    Insurance – contents for the quarter.

    Medical – doctor’s appointment for T.

    T fun – An expensive boys’ birthday outing. Paintball.

    Utilities – are high. T’s phone bill was $64 as he accidentally made some phone calls unwittingly. We went over our data limit with Orcon (this rarely happens), so that was $99. I locked in $81 of winter power (post coming up on our new provider) and spent $135 on electricity.

    A few updates…

    T was off work all month injured (really, he only went back in twice since last year, and only lasted about an hour on each of those days). We’ve received one week of payment from ACC, which pays out 80 percent of wages, and are hoping the other two weeks will be covered.

    I’ve started a subaccount called Wedding. It’s sitting at $360 and will be funded by T’s repayments to me (I have fronted him money previously for his bike, for the costs of his car accidents and some other things). This makes it much easier than me putting the money into my main savings account and having to keep track of his repayments in a spreadsheet.

    And our South Island road trip fund is sitting at just over $1000. Granted, we just booked flights to Christchurch where we’ll pick up the campervan, so this will go down once I make the payment to the Visa.

    I’ve also decided I would really like to start investing a bit of cash into international index funds outside of Kiwisaver, and in NZ stocks that pay dividends. not sure if this will be possible this year alongside our other savings, goals, though.

    How was your January? Spendy? Frugal?

  • February 2, 2012

    Friendships of the double x chromosome

    Original caption: Ne ties a friendship bracele...

    I recall reading on a blog once that one thing (among a long list) that men can never understand is the complicated dynamic of female friendships.

    Maybe it’s just me, but I’ve never had a fight with a friend. Male or female.

    During school, there have been times when my friends and I tried to run away from a girl who wanted to be friends with us. Real mature, I know.

    I’ve had friends turn on me or ditch me for various reasons, then come back to me.

    I’ve been jealous of friends striking up closer bonds with other friends than with me.

    And sometimes been insecure in my place as one of a few girls in a mainly male social circle.

    But a proper throwdown, shouting or silent-treatment argument?

    Never.

    That said, rivalry has played a part in a couple of friendships for me. I think that it was mainly one-sided (ie, in my head), to be honest. But the outcomes were very different. One I still consider a friend, if not a close one; the other, an acquaintance whose social circles sometimes overlap with mine – we can play nice together socially, but you wouldn’t catch us hanging out by ourselves.

    In the first case, we instantly bonded upon meeting in school – we were both emo, introspective soulmates, sarcastic, tough, too clever for our own good. We were good at many of the same things and almost went to the same university to do the same degree. I was glad she didn’t, to be honest. I would’ve gotten too competitive, and I don’t think it would have been healthy for us. I always saw her as a spunkier, more charismatic me (perhaps what I should aspire to be in a parallel world) and in my younger, more insecure days, sometimes that was a bit threatening. Don’t get me wrong; while she can be a hard case, she has a big heart, and I’ll never forget her taking me under her wing after my first big breakup. I admire her hugely, and she’s the only person I know who’s been toughing it out on her own longer than me, having been largely independent since about 14.

    For various reasons we drew apart. We studied different things, but now work in similar fields, which brought us closer together. I honestly think that we’ll be able to catch up once every three, five, ten years and still get along awesomely, no matter where our life paths take us.

    In the second case, we met, I think, through mutual friends. We were good time friends, and that’s how it always was. We were part of the same crew, hanging out after school and on weekends. I thought we had a lot in common. And I thought possibly we could be good friends, if not necessarily BFFs.

    Thing is, at the core of it, she was simply cold. There were some people she treated extremely well, and others who seemed just pawns to her. It was tough to relate to someone who’d never had to work for anything. She was kinda vain (and more photogenic, if not downright better-looking than me. I suppose that’s where the competition was at, in my head, but at least I always had nice-ness on my side, for whatever that’s worth). And ultimately, she talked shit about me. (There’s discussing your friends behind their backs, in private. And then there’s straight bitchy comments – not the kind you would ever utter aloud about a true friend – just while you’ve stepped out of the room, to their flatmate, of all people. Plus trolling your blog.)

    I’m really curious to hear your thoughts on female friendship. And have you ever had one of a competitive nature, real or imagined?

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