My fear of commitment

Confession: I have a fear of commitment.fear of Commitment

I refuse to commit to consumer contracts. I chose Orcon as our ISP partly for the prices and partly because they had no 12-month fixed term minimum contracts. Until I got a work phone, I was always on prepay, partly for the prices, and partly because there were no contracts involved.

I reluctantly committed to a contract with Sky TV at the boy’s request, and to a fixed lease on this house because it’s getting increasingly hard to rent anywhere on an open-ended basis.

My fear of commitment extends to, well, almost everything. I was a somewhat lax attender of quiz night with colleagues at my old job. At work, several sports teams have been formed, but even if any were sports I enjoy (which are few and far between) I balk at the thought of committing one evening a week to organised ongoing activity.

I haven’t committed to any regular organised extracurriculars since high school.

It’s also a factor in the rest of my life. This house is temporary. I don’t care about decor. I like white walls. I don’t give two figs about having Young House Love-esque surroundings. I genuinely don’t understand why people paint accent walls – or why anyone would want a purple, green, or yellow room.

But you know one thing I would like? Decent appliances – a fridge, a washing machine – and cookware.

I don’t want to commit to nice things until we buy a house of our own. Moving is a pain, and flatmates have wrecked too many of my belongings in the past (we live alone now but who knows what the future will bring).

But it would be amazing to have a decent frypan, a fridge that doesn’t freeze all vegetables within it, a freezer that’s not 40% icicles, and a washing machine that doesn’t sound like it’s about to explode on the spin cycle and works in cold water mode.

12 thoughts on “My fear of commitment

  1. The ability to rent on an open-ended basis mystifies me. I don’t even think that’s a possibility where I am. Rent is paid monthly and leases are signed for a minimum of a year, with the lease usually going month-to-month after that. Generally speaking, anything shorter than that and you’d need to sublet rather than rent directly. Then again, that might be different for other areas, but that’s been my experience at least.

  2. I think I’ve become more cautious about certain things, but overall am not afraid to commit (more to things like sports teams, going out with friends, etc). I just don’t like contracts. I would also love nice appliances. It’s my dream to have a dishwasher/washer/dryer in my unit. I want to punch people in the face who complain about doing laundry when it’s in their house. ugh!

  3. Ok, we are like best friends that have just never met. I have *serious* commitment issues about buying quality things or a house or anything that is even remotely-permanent

  4. I feel like it’s circumstantial. Maybe you’re not afraid of commitment, you just know that now is not the time to be laying deep roots. I definitely feel that. But I wish, wish, wish that I could commit to a home. Back when I lived in NYC, I felt like I could commit at one point and I accumulated all this wonderful furniture and decorations… and now it’s waiting patiently for me to return and find a place that’s for real right for committing.

  5. I am a semi-commitment-phobe. I hate having to sign contracts (looking at you cellphone) but managed to commit to a mortgage. Come to think of it, I’m more afraid of commitment when there are people involved than anything else, if that makes any sense…

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