We all know how important it is to be on the same page financially with your other half. However you choose to do that – whether it’s combined, separate or something in between finances, with one person taking care of most of the details or both being equally involved – isn’t as important as actually heading in the same direction, together.
But how far would you go to help out your significant other? How much would you lend him/her? (I don’t mean for frivolities, I mean for unexpected expenses, or other expenses they might not be able to cover at the time). Would you ever gift them money, if you were in such a position? Would you be willing to help them towards any debt he/she might have? And how does that change whether you are seriously committed, cohabiting or married?
I’m wary about helping with debt. Only because I had a lot of debt and got out of it..
With that being said, if they were in trouble, I’d help them make debt payments, pay for the rent, food etc… but they are NOT ALLOWED to spend on anything frivolous (entertainment and eating out included)
They’d be on a tight budget, basic essentials only. And if they wanted to spend on something like a new pair of shoes.. no freaking way. They’d have to go through me first, because I’m the one fronting the money for them.
And I would expect them to slowly pay me back once they got back on their feet. I wouldn’t keep a debt tracker per se, but I’d think: Look, it’s about $700 a month, x 5 months = $3500
It wouldn’t be fair to take advantage of the generous loan being given, even if we are together romantically. And I wouldn’t do that to them.
I guess I’m like this, (hardcore 50/50 in all relationships), because I’ve been very resentful and burned in the past. It’s hard to get over those experiences, and that’s why I’m fair to both parties.
I dunno. That may just be me. Luckily, BF is the same way 🙂