Last weekend I attended my first Indian wedding, where I saw some old friends for the first time since getting home. (You might recall that my high school girlfriends are all Indian, but of the other two who are wed, one got married in India while we were in Europe and the other is Muslim, so that wedding was equally colourful but different in a few ways.) Here’s what I came away thinking:
I was surprised by how comfortable they all seem with their husbands
Without going into all the back stories, suffice it to say none of them have been together anywhere near as long as T and I have, all have been long distance for a significant amount of time, including more or less from the beginning of their relationships, and only one have been living together for awhile. I was especially amused to see how well my arranged-marriage friend and her husband were gelling. Maybe for some people, you really do know instantly, and I’m sure when you’re really close to your family, you can trust your parents to find you a reasonably compatible match.
Food in bulk is almost guaranteed to be mediocre
Now, I think I’d need to attend more of these huge weddings (as in 300+ people) but I think it’s fairly safe to say that when you’re catering to numbers like that, it’s tough to churn out amazing food. So far, the meals have been a serious letdown – disappointing, because I adore Indian food.
I have no idea what the future holds for our friendships
One has moved to another part of the city. One is moving to Sydney. One is still in Singapore, and who knows where she’ll wind up next. These are not, at least for me, BFF relationships. They are of the catch-up-every-few-months ilk. It’s hard enough to corral us all in one place a couple times a year, and with us all splintering off geographically at last … it’s definitely the next phase of our adult lives, and I am unsure how that will shape our friendships. I expected to be nattering away to S at the reception, as we hadn’t seen each other in six months, but instead she was caught up in discussions with her husband, parents, and sister-in-law most of the time. (Related: I am way too awkward, and it pains me that I haven’t instantly become buddies with all the new husbands, like one of our other girlfriends has.)
To the links!
Chelsea Talks Smack on doing the best you can, every day
Ask a Manager on dealing with being overworked and overloaded
Penelope Trunk on four ways to earn more money
Ms Career Girl on six things you should accomplish in your first year on the job
Finally, here are 10 truly awesome ideas for unique Christmas gifts (love the memory jar!)
Maybe going into an arranged marriage, they’re easygoing about it, as are their husbands. Love is built over time, not from a single spark… although the spark helps start that fire.
Food in bulk is mediocre. I have never been to a wedding yet with amazing food.
I can’t imagine going to a wedding with over 300 people. Good Indian food is amazing, but bad Indian food can be…well pretty bad.
Bummer that the food wasn’t good! I’m having a ‘huge’ Sri Lankan wedding next year and it will be the traditional buffet style – food has been hit and miss at past weddings I’ve been to, so my fingers are crossed on ours. We’ll have about 350 people – huge to most people but I guess it’s all relative. Ha!