All else being equal – wouldn’t you rather have the money?

Wouldn't you rather have the money?

Money can’t buy everything, it’s true.

But when going through hard times for whatever reason, I know I’d rather not add financial stress to the fire.

Seriously: would you rather be suffering while broke or suffering while  financially secure? It’s a no brainer.

Going through a separation or divorce? Imagine adding the constant stress of struggling to pay the day to day bills, on top of all that.

When you have hit a point in your marriage that you no longer wish to stay married there are two options in divorce law for you. You have absolute and limited divorce law to choose from.

You will also find that some states have different views on divorce law above the national government.

An absolute divorce is a termination based on misconduct in the marriage or a statutory cause. In this case the divorced couple is then considered single. Elizabeth J. Nacy helps you in the Divorce Law.

With a limited divorce you will have a separation decree. In this case the divorce law is going to still see you as a couple despite cohabitation being terminated.

You can also choose a no fault divorce is several states. A no fault divorce is where the couple does not have a reason why the marriage failed and there are no grounds being bandied about.

Previously in divorce law the judge or court of law would require some time of proof that a party in the divorce had done something wrong such as adultery, or another act.

The no fault divorce allows for the divorcing parties to save face. They don’t have to air their dirty laundry in front of others or provide a reason for the divorce. At the end of a no fault divorce the couples are then considered single.

You will also find that in divorce law a divorce decree can be contested. In this case the individuals applying for divorce has issues that the court must work out. Most often a contested divorce involves property or children.

In the case of divorce law regarding children the parents must decide on custody. In some instances the mother or father may have restricted rights for seeing their child.

There is also the result of alimony. During a divorce the court will take time to observe both parents and find an agreement in a child custody case.

Going through health issues? Wouldn’t you want the option of the best treatment money can buy?

Hard times are hard enough without having to worry about finances. Having money reduces that burden; shrinks the heap.

All the health and marital woes I’ve gone through stem directly from financial stress and struggle. The one thing I was grateful for during that time was that at least I wasn’t trying to do it on a journalist’s salary at that point. Literally every problem I’ve been saddled with in adulthood could have been solved with money in one way or another. (Yes, I’ve been fortunate in that regard, and I do acknowledge this.)

To everyone who says that the hardest experiences they’ve gone through were when they actually had plenty of money (subtext: and it didn’t do me a damn bit of good!), here’s an honest question for you. I ask: would you rather have endured those shitty times WITHOUT the money?

Of course you would give up the money to make the Bad Thing go away, that’s a given. But that’s not the question here; it’s not would you rather be free of the Bad Thing and in exchange go back to being broke? The question is, if the Bad Thing was unavoidable, would you prefer to deal with the crisis while being financially stable … or not?

Take life insurance, for example. It can’t make up for the loss of a loved one, but it can alleviate or eliminate major worries during an already difficult time.

It’s incredibly freeing to not have to make decisions solely based on the dollars and cents. To have the option of thinking about overall value, rather than just the bottom line.

Life is expensive. Having money means having choices.

*Part of Financially Savvy Saturdays on brokeGIRLrich, Disease Called Debt and Frame to Freedom*

8 thoughts on “All else being equal – wouldn’t you rather have the money?

  • Reply Jaime @ Jaime Donovan May 20, 2016 at 16:51

    With money obviously. I was watching Dave Ramsey’s show and they had this guy on there and he and his wife went through FPU and he ended up getting cancer, and he said there’s no way his family would be fine if he and his wife didn’t get their act together before the cancer hit.

  • Reply Melanie @ Dear Debt May 21, 2016 at 06:53

    Agree 100%! Money makes life easier. Money gives you choices. I HATED feeling like I had no choices when I was deep in debt and broke.

  • Reply Stephany May 21, 2016 at 12:32

    Oh, yes, I totally agree with you. Money doesn’t buy happiness, but damn, it sure does make life easier.

  • Reply Linda May 23, 2016 at 04:55

    Having money certainly lessens the mental load associated with everyday life. And not having that extra bit to worry about during a crisis frees one up to concentrate on the other bits that need sorting out. I’ve had a lot of health challenges in the last year, but I’ve never had to worry about any financial strain associated with seeing doctors frequently, filling many prescriptions, having surgery, and being off work. Good insurance and generous benefits have helped a lot, but also having money in the bank that I could use for co-pays, house-sitter, and other extra expenses has been wonderful.

  • Reply Femme Frugality May 23, 2016 at 13:53

    I agree that having those choices is not only a stress reliever, but frankly empowering. Especially when you’re talking about things like separation or divorce. I think where people start tilting the scale and running into trouble is when they spend all of their time and effort in the pursuit of money as a solution to all problems, as it often causes them to ignore other areas of your life, causing problems that otherwise wouldn’t have existed. I guess it’s what’s at the root of the problem: was it money (either the lack thereof or too intense of a pursuit of it?) Or was it something else that was completely unavoidable? If the latter, I’d totally rather have money. And completely acknowledge and have lived the fact that not having it creates problems in and of itself

  • Reply Tonya@Budget and the Beach May 23, 2016 at 15:37

    I agree. It’s kind of like what I wrote about with being financially flexible. It just feels like you have so many more options.

  • Reply Francesca - From Pennies to Pounds May 28, 2016 at 10:18

    Would rather have money! Have you heard the thing that’s been going around…’Money doesn’t buy you happiness, but I’d rather be crying on a jet ski in the Caribbean’ – or something along those lines! Made me laugh 🙂

  • Reply Helen January 23, 2018 at 02:25

    Very good point. Money does give us choices. It could help to reduce the pains and hassles in daily life. When an emergency happens, the last thing we should worry about is money.

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