If you don’t feel whole in yourself, if you feel empty and slightly desperate…
If you don’t have confidence in yourself, love yourself, and love your unique flavour of brilliance…
If you wouldn’t buy what you’re offering…
How can you expect others to? How can you expect anyone else to buy in? To hire you? Embrace you?
If you don’t feel good and grounded and convinced and strong in yourself, that is going to shine through, no matter how thick you layer up the mask and how hard you try to hide it.
Coming into something from a state of flow, fun, and ease changes all the energy around it. It infuses your actions and that’s something other people can feel.
It changes the energy and conviction with which you show up. Spurs you to act. Those actions then inevitably tend to deliver better results, encouraging you to keep going and doing more.
So what’s powering your actions? What’s the underlying drive and vibe behind them?
Taking care of yourself, indulging and enjoying yourself isn’t frivolous. Do things that fill up your cup and your heart. Think of it as a way of putting on your own oxygen mask first. It is truly a worthwhile investment.
If you can’t enjoy it along the way, appreciating what you have now – what makes you think you will if you ever get what you’re striving for?
It’s hard to imagine something you have never had before. You can, however, imagine how it would feel to have it. How you’d act, think, feel, be. What you would do to celebrate. So much so that when the time finally does come, when it rolls around, it’s gonna feel somewhat like a familiar memory. Turns out our brains are pretty simple in that regard. They don’t really know what’s real and what’s imagined. Time doesn’t really exist.
People talk about the importance of prioritising pleasure/joy/fun. Honestly… all those words are pretty triggering for me and I’m working through that for myself. I’m going with fun as it feels the least loaded. The concepts seem so frivolous and there are decades of conditioning around this to deconstruct. Not helped at all by becoming a parent, I must say. The push to start martyring ourselves, denying ourselves, stripping pleasure and enjoyment from our lives, starts even before our kids are born. But I digress…
I believe you can’t get/have/keep what you can’t feel. Not for long, anyway. And if you gotta feel the goodness before it actually arrives and shows its face, and if that actually helps fuel and accelerate the whole process… why the hell not?
If you’ve been stuck at the same level for awhile, wanting to break through to the next level… struggling and hustling, with not much to show for it … shift gears and give it a try. This just might be the missing piece of the puzzle.