I have very little patience for insincerity and bullshitters. The older I get, the more my tolerance wanes. I just can’t be bothered with that kind of crap.
My social circle is kind of disparate. There are my girlfriends from school – one of whom I’ve known for ten years – who I see every couple of months, but I’m really only close to a few of them and I probably wouldn’t hang out one-on-one with about half of them. We tend to organise mass catchups over lunch/dinner and see each other on birthdays etc, and although sometimes it’s frustrating trying to get everyone together in one place, I always have a good time with them. I have a few other random friends (uni, friends of friends), who aren’t necessarily connected to any of my other friends, and then my inner circle who I see more often. We’re a group from school who hang out sometimes as much as every weekend and are my first port of call. And they’re all guys, pretty much. Then I suppose we have a secondary social circle (different people) which overlaps with my main circle, who I socialise with but am not close to.
Sadly, within this extended group are one or two downers. And by downers, I mean shallow, selfish, insincere bitches. Charismatic, though, and fun, so most people either don’t notice, or downright embrace their antics. But that’s something I’ve had enough of, and I just ignore it entirely. I can’t escape it, but I don’t have to play along. There are enough good people in my life to surround myself with, so why bother with the bad seeds?
Thoughts? Where did you meet most of your friends? How often do you see them? And do you have patience for fake, bitchy acquaintances?
I have a couple of close friends that I see all the time.. One I have known since intermediate school, so 16 years.
I also have a few friends that I email and text often but don’t see much.
I had a friend that was negative, needy and if I ever had to do something that wasn’t for or about her would make me feel guilty. October last year I told her that I didn’t want to be friends anymore.. it was very very freeing (if that is a word) – There was heaps more to it that made it come to a head but I’m glad I did it!!
I’m in the Winter of my life and I have very few friends now. Some friends have moved on, some have past on (HIV/AIDS, car accidents, and in one case alcoholism – her liver became as big a football!), and one friend fortunately, two years ago, moved in – and I love him to bits. Love happens when you least expect it.
Unlike when I was your age, I am now prepared to end friendships as hard as that is. I was inspired to do this by something Karl Largarfeld said in the brillant movie about his life: Lagerfeld Confidential. When people constantly let him down, he ended the friendships. I adore Lagerfeld – if I look as good as he does at his age I will be very happy indeed.
I will check in from time to see how your getting on. The most important thing to do is to save as much money as you can to get your own place. Save save save sister!
I’m more like you too. I have a very few close friends I constantly prefer to go out with because they make me feel comfortable. More are like, I happen to bump into when i hang out and stuff. We talk and have fun but not actually sharing anything aside of that. Living in a big city yet connected to one another social cliques, overshare will only bring anyone down. Many, many bitchy acquintances. Sometimes we don’t even know which one
[…] that I decided long ago I couldn’t be effed with fake friends and don’t get invited to […]
[…] of those I hold dear. I don’t mean not being smart and selective about those in my life; sometime ago I pledged to let go of bad seeds. But even good friends sometimes make choices I don’t like and don’t agree with. Nobody […]