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  • How I FINALLY learned to budget: The long road to budgeting bliss

    How I learned to budget

    I’ve always been good with money. I got my first job – a paper round – at 13, making something like a whopping $80 a month, and saved every dollar I earned.

    I got my first real job in Year 11 at a cafe, working weekends. Then I decided I wanted to get an electric guitar, so I got another job at a call centre working weekdays after school. I worked constantly for months until I scraped together the $600 for my Ibanez and my amp, plus other paraphernalia like cords, a case, picks and the like.

    I moved out of home the following year and got by with barely $20 a week to spare, but I made it work.

    Then I – we – lost track a bit when T and I moved in together, throwing a car into the mix, along with other things. After a few months I sat down, went through our bank statements and was shocked to see what we were spending on food. (The first step to budgeting: tracking, and knowing what you’re spending.)

    Thus began some pathetic attempts at budgeting, stymied largely by variations in numbers. Income varied every week. Rent was the same every week, but all our other expenses varied. Plus of course, there are all the irregular expenses that crop up at the least opportune times. Cue head explosion.

    I would mock up beautiful budgets with colourful bars for each category. Breathless, I would log on after pay day and see how the numbers stacked up against the plan. Almost always, I would be thwarted, and give up yet again, thinking I could never make it work.

    Until one day I realised something very simple. The numbers fluctuated. And so should the budget. A budget is a living document that evolves as necessary.

    Instead of trying to make the money match my ideal budget every week, I needed to tailor the budget to that week’s numbers.

    Amazing, right?

    So simple, so obvious. Nonetheless, this was a major epiphany that cut through the fog.

    Did some overtime? That can go into savings.

    Lean week? Time to trim and eat in all weekend.

    The next step: figuring out how to handle those irregular expenses. I sat down and calculated what power, phone and internet was costing us, as well as less frequent payments like insurance, car registration and all those other bills. I added up an annual figure and divided that by 52. Every week, I put aside that amount into a subaccount, and then draw money from it as bills come due.

    Then simplify, simplify, simplify. Now that I’ve got a good system going, our expenditure in any one week is pretty predictable. Rent, groceries, petrol, bill money, and a little bit for fun – eating out, entertainment, etc. Done. It’s at the stage where I no longer budget, in fact, although I carefully track our spending every month.

    In my mind, budgeting bliss comes down to three steps:

    • Awareness – getting your head out of the sand about what you’re spending and facing up to the numbers
    • Action – doing something about it. Tackling debt, cutting back on frivolous spending, finding ways to trim your essential expenses
    • Automation – getting into a comfortable routine. Once this is second nature (I might even venture to use the term “autopilot”), you may not even feel the need to budget as such any more

    Need some more guidance? I like the 60% solution – a basic formula with suggestions for how much you should spend on various things:

    • 60% to Committed Expenses
    • 10% to Retirement.
    • 10% to Irregular Expenses
    • 10% to Long-Term Savings/Debt
    • 10% for Fun

    And if you’re after a budget spreadsheet, Budgets are Sexy has a handy list with a ton of free templates here.

    Are you a stringent budgeter, or more of a hands-off gal like me?

    This post is part of Women’s Money Week 2012. For more posts about budgeting see the Budgeting Roundup

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  • The long road to financial harmony

    HOW TO FIND FINANCIAL BALANCE WITH YOUR PARTNER

    Financial nirvana. Does it it exist?

    I’m not sure, but I can tell you that no two people handle money the exact same way, and being on a different page from your partner is a recipe for teeth-gnashing and tears.

    However you handle finances – joint accounts, separate, or a mix; equally, or with one person handling the bulk of the admin – reaching some basic agreements about money management is so important. Think along the lines of:

    • how you’ll each contribute to expenses
    • how you handle debt
    • how you’ll save for big goals
    • how much is okay to spend without consulting the other person
    • how much is reasonable to spend on (fill in the blank – could be clothing, food, video games, whatever)

    T and I kind of fell in the deep end with joint finances early on in our relationship. We moved in together, he started a new job and didn’t have a bank account of his own, so organised to be paid into my account. I also started university, we bought a car, and generally had more cash than we’d ever had – but vehicle expenses, getting T set up with the basics for work and life, and letting the extra income go to our heads (mainly to food, actually) meant we struggled a lot.

    Pretty early on, our wildly different money personalities became evident. I’ll be honest, it wasn’t easy. But I don’t think it would have been any easier if we’d delayed it. Heck, it might have been even worse, if he’d been left to his own devices.

    I can’t tell you when you should have the “money talk” with your partner, or what kind of financial system you should set up. Heck, some people go all their lives without knowing how much their significant other earns. Separate finances make total sense if both parties already have a good thing going individually and don’t mind splitting everything (personally I’d get fed up with all the calculations; do I really want to be keeping track of who last bought toilet paper .. or, later down the track, diapers for our little bundle of anxiety?).

    We went all out early on, but I’ve since refined it so that T has his own separate savings account and his own allowance/spending money every week: proof that joint finances can work even when one is a saver and one a spender. Whether we’ll combine savings fully once we get married remains to be seen, but I think we’ll always maintain some kind of husband fund for him to save up for toys – a bigger motorbike, a project car, etc. (Plus of course, even if both parties have access to the joint accounts, it can be nice to have a pot of your own.)

    What if it all goes pear-shaped?

    I suppose that’s a big one in favour of separate accounts. It’s true, nothing in life or love is certain. But if you have any sense (and I know my readers do) you wouldn’t be meshing funds unless you were pretty serious. Making a personal and emotional commitment to another human being is also a financial commitment, and for some couples that lends itself to joint bank accounts.

    Caveat: if I was a celebrity, I definitely wouldn’t. Nor would I fail to get a prenup and I sure as hell would not change my surname. I know every celeb thinks their marriage will be different, but the odds are heinously against you.

    Seriously though, while I would not recommend mixing finances as early as we did, I’m happy with how it turned out. We’ve settled into a semi-blissful groove, and if we ever split, it’s decided: he takes the TV, food processor, microwave, and his motorbike; I get the bed, laptop and car.

     

    This post is part of Women’s Money Week 2012. For more posts about relationships and money, see the Relationships and Money Roundup

  • Tuesday Three: Twitter tripups

    Oh, I know posts on social media sins are so overdone. But today I just felt like tackling my top three pet peeves on Twitter.

    Incorrect use of @usernames. Example: Niche sports site runs a post on Jeremy Lin’s top five moments. It might tweet: @JLin7 is basketball’s new wonderboy. Check out his best scores: bit.ly/whatever. If you’re starting off a tweet with an @name, it will only be visible to you, the person @named and anyone who happens to follow BOTH of you. The fix: place a full stop, quote mark, RT or something else ahead of the @name so it’s public. (I see this all the time at work, particularly by smaller businesses RTing our content, and I just don’t have time to point it out to every single one – but I think I may have to find the time!). 

    Asking for retweets. Common among newbs and people who don’t get that social media is not just for pushing marketing messages. I’ve seen it too many times. “Check out my latest post on how to make money online. Please RT!” Don’t beg. It’s not pretty. Yeah, I’m calling you out.

    Overuse of hashtags. “Why @Pinterest is the hottest thing ever! #tech #socialmedia #marketing #digital #pinterest” It’s ugly. It looks amateur. It makes many of us a lot less likely to even look at your tweet. One or two appropriate hashtags at a time will suffice.

  • Eat of the week: Sal Rose

    Sal Rose is a bit of a suburban secret. It’s a veritable institution in the leafy streets of Mt Albert, just across from Rocket Park, next to Pyrenees and the Four Square (possibly the last one left in Auckland?) and down the road from the school and wave pools.

    The wait staff are young, but the clientele is old. We were by far the most youthful customers – the others were all elderly women and families who settled into the booths for an evening of it.

    It’s all very rustic. Roll up into the car park and you’re greeted by some barrels and chairs outside. Step over the threshold and the interior is all dark wood and comfortably solid. There’s almost a sense that time slows down; the atmosphere is very leisurely and decidedly classy, without being intimidating.

    Mains seem to hover around a median price of $25-30, with plenty of pizzas and pastas in a range of wickedly delectable flavours. Prawns, artichokes, and mushrooms feature predominantly. Spag bol comes as a side option – you can nab a bowl for about $7. Or for the die-hard meateaters, there’s always the Angus beef.

    We went for the crab ravioli, which thankfully was stuffed with real crab meat, in a rich golden sauce with a subtle hint of olive oil and wine. Beautifully presented, if not in especially notable quantities.

    The pizza was the star of the meal, however – a delightfully pliable, airy crust, topped with generous amounts of cheese and vegetables. I can tell you now that I’ll never achieve such a dough at home; I’m not even going to attempt to crack the secret of recreating it.

    Sal Rose

    Alberton Ave, Mt Albert

  • What we spent: February 2012

    ** Click here for more info on my monthly spending roundups.**

    Some notes:

    Dining – Pretty happy with that!

    Groceries – Ditto.

    Fines – Not pleased, not pleased at all. T managed to get two speeding tickets this month, after a lovely few clean years. Both have been paid, although one will show up in next month’s accounts.

    Holidays – Paid $300, finally, for our New Year’s accommodation. About $100 for petrol, toll and food for our weekend up north. And just over $370 on booking flights to the South Island for our planned September road trip. Post on that coming.

    Home expenses – A little misleading, because I can’t split transactions here. $50 was for a game for T, the rest on a radio alarm clock (which handily enough also charges our phones). His phone has been crapping out and the alarm not working, and seeing as he needs to be up at 5.30am – not a time one would normally rise othewise – this was needed.

    Motorbike – only got topped up once, but we paid for three months worth of registration, which cost an ungodly $109.

    Utilities – Higher than usual. Power and phone/internet are bang on, but Sky TV was higher because we put movies back on for a month, T had two lots of cell phone bills and we paid our water bill (only $33 for two months. It’s ridiculously low, I think, because we split the bill evenly with the tenant in the back unit – there’s only one meter – and she’s NEVER home, so we get the best end of the deal).

    Vehicle – This has been the worst summer ever. It’s like we missed out on an entire season. I’m over this crappy weather, not least because rain means more driving, less biking for T.

    Pretty happy overall – pretty lean, pretty in line with my priorities – speeding fines excepted. How was your month?

  • Link love (Powered by spontaneity and scribblings)

    NZMuse - Link love roundup with awesome reads from the week

    We all have a story that we use to define ourselves.

    Mine used to be that I moved out of home very young. Mine is of independence and bootstrapping.

    I’m not sure what it is now, though. Is it one of a continual quest for balance? Is it one of teetering on the brink of a quarterlife crisis? Is it just Or is it just living a quiet, largely content life? Or is that not punchy enough?

    Tell me, what’s your life arc?

    MONEY

    Kiwis take note: Taxpayers will no longer be able to file tax returns only when they are due a refund from the IRD, under proposed changes being considered (a loophole that I as a taxpayer wholeheartedly condone, but accept you can’t have your cake forever).

    Cook like a peasant, save money, at Get Rich Slowly.

    When a house becomes a prison – StacFace offers insights into the life of an underwater homeowner.

    10 ways to feel rich via Yes and Yes.

    WORK

    At Brazen Careerist, first job tales from some A-list bloggers.

    Amazeballs headline, even better post, at Make a Living Writing. How to get great blogging clients, even if you’re a teenage Nigerian.

    What’s it like going back to corporate life after entrepreneurship? Interesting column here.

    Afford Anything on the 10 laws of career reinvention.

    I love reading about other people’s workdays. Makeunder My Life shares her routine here.

    Interview questions you need to master, by Untemplater.

    Looking to launch a side hustle? Cordelia tell you what you’re really in for.

    Via the Wall Street Journal, cool insights into the serious biz of waitressing, including neat tricks like why you always hand the dessert menu quietly to a parent. (I was a terrible server, myself. And personally, I’m one of those people that says my meal was “okay” when really I’mn disappointed because I can’t bring myself to say so to someone’s face)

    One to reference should I jump on the novelling bandwagon in the future. How to find time for fiction when you already spend all day writing, by Dollars and Deadlines.

    Another cracker with food for thought from Study Hacks. Can I be happy as an investment banker? The difference between pursuing a lifestyle and following passion.

    From Musings of an Inappropriate Woman: Why writers shouldn’t write off trade magazines (need proof? How about potential overseas travel? Granted, that’s pretty rare, but…)

    LIFE, etc

    Five awesome tips for getting a better start to your day, via Dumb Little Man.

    Sandy asks: Would you steal food for your family if you were desperate?

    Too many interests (Um, yes!) Leo at Zen Habits shares how he’s fitting in all the things he’s learning.

    A must-read take on the copyright grey areas of Pinterest by a lawyer-slash-photographer who’s quit the site.

    To get ahead, do one small thing at a time, via Budgets Are Sexy.

    Daisy lists four ways to hold yourself back if you’re a woman.

    FOOD

    Stonesoup has some great suggestions for getting out of a breakfast rut (I definitely am – can’t wait to try some of these recipes).

    The Joy of Caking promises this is the easiest mac and cheese you’ll ever make.

    And finally, don’t miss:

    This week’s Carnival of Financial Camaraderie at Canadian Finance Blog! I’m in there arguing that student life ain’t meant to be easy.

    Or the Carnival of Personal Finance at Girls Just Wanna Have Funds, where I’m seriously chuffed to be an editor’s pick with my ramblings on career and earning dynamics in relationships.

  • Yes, you can.

    yes you can motivation inspiration<image via aigle_dore on flickr>

    Shaking up your life is terrifying.

    Too often we’re unhappy with the way our lives are going.

    And that’s not necessarily a bad thing. Acknowledging a problem is the first step toward rectifying it.

    But you have to know what you want.

    Ain’t no use wanting to make a change but not knowing what that change should be.

    That old adage – failing to plan is planning to fail – it’s true.

    It’s not enough to decide you want to be all Brad Pitt in Legends of the Fall and take off for years to do your own thing – kill zebras, sail on epic ships, visit Indian gurus and who knows what else – they were pretty vague in that film.

    You need an end goal and you need to lay out the steps to take to reach that point.

    And if you’re really committed to it, you’ll have to get past the fear.

    You’ll have to stop throwing up every conceivable barrier, every reason why you can’t.

    Maybe you’ll find you don’t really want to follow through. Fine.

    But if you DO, then you gotta balls up and take action.

    Tell me.

    Do you ever get frustrated by people who won’t take steps to take control of their own lives?

    And how do you determine whether you really, really want something, when it’s not something you can realistically trial beforehand?

  • The lives I’d like to lead

    Imagine the life you’d like to live, they say – and take steps toward making it a reality.

    One of my favourite reads this month came from Paranoid Asteroid, writing about the life she has vs the life she wants (albeit more a post about consumerism than anything else).

    Personally…

    English: Bullseye on a standard Harrows Bristl...

    Image via Wikipedia

    I’d like to be good enough to play in a band.

    I’d like to be an amazing cook.

    I’d like to be a blogger who makes lots of money blogging.

    I’d like to be part of a high-earning power couple.

    I’d like to be a travel nomad.

    I’d like to buy a house and put down roots.

    I’d like to be a frugal but stylish blogger who always looks put together.

    There is no way I can do all of these things.

    Part of finding balance is making choices.

    Pick the things that really matter.

    Identify the one, two or three goals that you truly care about, and attack them.

    That’s my deep thought for the day. Go forth and epiphanise (yes, I am making it a verb) for yourself.

  • My blogging footprint

    My history dabbling in the management and running of websites dates back to the turn of the century.

    I had an S Club 7 fan site hosted on homepage.com. I was actually pretty proud of it. I had a wicked nav bar which changed colour as you rolled over the menu buttons (I stole the CSS off another site and tweaked it), a Bravenet hit counter, guestbook, photos, lyrics to every single song of theirs and MP3s for downloads.

    Shit, copyright holders would have had a field day back in this wild west of content. I honestly don’t remember where I got all those image, music and video files that I linked to – presumably off various other S Club 7 sites without a thought to rights. That’s how things were.

    I think I also had a Tripod site (simply because I recently got an email from Tripod – who knew they were still around?) and a Geocities page on which a friend and I posted parodies to songs that we made up during classes.

    I occasionally blogged on Bebo, and in 2008 on a whim started up this WordPress blog here during downtime at my part time job. I picked WordPress because I liked the look of it better than Blogger (a good choice) and my username back before “musings” became passe, with my initial in front (twice for good measure. I have no love for e.e. cummings but I do think that’s an awesome moniker).

    I’ve also got another two WP blogs – one I set up when T and I were flathunting in an effort to boost our chances, and one that’s not search-engine indexed that was meant to serve as my professional site, where I keep links to my best stories and such. Were I to get laid off, I’d whip that all into shape (possibly merging it with this blog to take advantage of its longevity).

    But that’s not all. I’ve got a Posterous blog languishing, which was my first attempt at setting up a professional blog/website/portfolio, and lasted maybe two months.

    And I’ve got my Tumblr, where I post photos from Project 365, reblog cool shit and share other snippets from life. I have to say, though, I’ve seen some awesome fully functioning websites built on Tumblr, and if I was starting from scratch today I’d be very tempted to make Tumblr my platform.

    And slightly off topic, my writing itself dates back to the age of about 13-14, when I scored my first blogging gig (back before the word existing) writing an online “diary” for possibly the first women’s oriented online mag here. That, and all the other niche sites I went on to write for, have now gone through many incarnations and those words have been dispensed into the web’s graveyard, for which I am partially thankful.

    My digital path is a bit of a wasteland. I should probably get around to cleaning up the litter of my abandoned footprints.

    What does yours look like?

  • Tom and Lynette, you’re breaking my heart

    Confession: I watch Desperate Housewives.

    Confession two: I am ridiculously sad that Tom and Lynette have split up.

    They’ve always been my favourite couple. She, the Type-A superwoman; he, the easy-going complement. T and I always agreed he was the best husband on the street.

    To me, there’s one big lesson to be learned from their demise.

    Imbalance can be deathly to a relationship.

    If you are a driven person, it will be very hard to take the back seat to your partner’s career.

    Lynette was a career woman to the core – as evidenced by her inability to defer to Tom even after encouraging him to pursue a big career move that saw his star really rise.

    She supported, pushed him even, into accepting a high-powered job. He wasn’t keen, but eventually embraced his new position. And Lynette found that difficult to accept – being relegated to spa sessions with the other wives on an executive retreat, refusing to treat Tom like an actual client when he hired her to redecorate his office, and so on. She wanted it both ways – she wanted him to succeed, but not to play the role of supporting spouse – and refused to accept that the dynamic was irrevocably altered.

    All of that made worse by the fact that they both work(ed) in the same field, and that Lynette brought the entire situation on herself. Sometimes the things you think you want don’t make you happy, after all.

    Worst of all, it seemed she’d lost her own financial stability – surely having Tom stop by the house to drop off a cheque would have to qualify as a serious lifetime low.

    I’m not saying that who makes the most holds all the cards. But I am aware that if you’re in a partnership where one party ultimately calls the shots, and the other suddenly becomes a power player professionally, that’s probably going to seep over into the personal realm.

    I’m thankful that T does not work in the same industry as I do – partly because 2 x journalist incomes will never equal pots of money – but mainly because I think the competitiveness factor would kill us dead. And that’s all on my part. I can’t help myself. I would not be able to separate the personal and professional – to stop comparing our work, to make sure I measured up or better, to stop any envy eating away at our relationship.

    I’d like to think if we ended up in the same scenario, that it wouldn’t break us. Him making most of the money would not represent a seismic power shift, because I’d still be the household money manager, keeping things humming along, perhaps working with a bigger budget. And if, like Lynette, adjusting to the new order proved tougher than it might seem, I’d hope that I would be able to rationally view how I was dealing with the situation and actually communicate with T to figure out how I could cope better.

    I’m still rooting for these two.

    Who’s your favourite DH couple? To what extent do you think money plays a role in relationship dynamics?