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Browsing tag: life

  • May 26, 2009

    Shiny happy people

    Okay, so the title really has nothing to do with the post. In fact, it’s pretty much the opposite of how I’m feeling. But I’ve got the phrase stuck in my head after seeing the REM video in the pub today at lunch, and it’s as good a title as any!Katie

    Why was I in the pub at lunch? Weeeell….

    BF texted me five minutes before the end of my first lecture. Mechanics FINALLY got round to looking at his car. Not the clutch after all, nooo…..but a crack in the gearbox. To the tune of $1300.

    Stomach started turning tricks, as it does when I’m stressed. I called him back, confirmed the horrible truth, and went for a walk around campus. I waited FOREVER at the crossing for this one way street, and a girl breezed along past me and walked across. I decided to do the same, seeing as the traffic was stopped and was only going one way. Of course, the bus driver at the lights honked at me; obviously their light went green just as I started across. I ate the chocolate brownie I made last night. I generally wallowed for a bit, then went to the library and lost myself in a book till I was due to meet a friend for lunch.

    “I need a stiff drink. Where to?” I texted.

    “London Bar?”

    “Sounds good,” I sent back.

    London Bar was civilised enough to not open until 4pm, so we went to Father Ted’s next door (open from 10am, FYI). I nursed a whiskey on the rocks, he had a Guinness, and we had beer battered fish and chips. REM, Oasis, Justin Timberlake, Amy Winehouse and the Ting Tings played in the background. Then we debated over whether the Sugababes’ Freak Like Me was their first single.

    He said: No, it was that one, you know, with the car, where they…um…and it has the word situation?

    Me: *puzzled look*…… OH!!! *bangs head on bar top* Wasn’t it called Destination something!!

    He knew what I meant. I knew what he was talking about.

    “That was IMPRESSIVE! Just from the one word!”

    (I just googled it. It was actually called Overload, although one of the search results did call it ‘Destination”)

    We did a spot of shopping, where I failed to find a dress for my friend’s party. And we went into Smith and Caughey’s, and ooohed and ahhhhed over baby clothes and toys (since when does a posh place like SnC stock BONDS?? Since when did Bonds make baby gear??) In particular, a $79 music box amused us to no end, as did an antique telephone ($339) and a $55 baby comforter (I originally thought it was $5 and was almost tempted to buy it just because it was surely the cheapest item in the store….and what is a comforter anyway?? It looked like a piece of fuzzy fabric folded in half, topped off with a bear’s head, to me…).

    And why on earth did I check the prices on everything! And remember them six hours later??

    When I got home, me and BF popped over to see the LL. I had every intention of telling him we wanted a rent reduction if the water wasn’t sorted in a week. But he seemed so apologetic, I didn’t.

    So now I’m settled in front of the fire, trying to put off typing up a huge bunch of notes for a project, and thinking, when life throws lemons at you, just make a sour face, head to the bar and order a nasty, nasty whiskey.

  • May 23, 2009

    Weekend wrapup

    It’s been a hell of a week.

    Sunday: Plumber was meant to come, according to LL. Never showed. Man, am I sick of being fucked around.

    Monday: Up at 6, went with BF to sit his full licence. His friend N turns up to pick us up (he was sitting his too, straight before BF, and lending BF the car for his)…only to inform us his registration had run out two days ago and he’d only just realised. But at 6.30am, there ain’t nowhere to buy a new rego. NOWHERE.

    Instructor tells friend he can fit him in at 3.30. BF rings around to see who he can borrow a car off. My friend M obliges, but turning up with one headlight out. It’s the instructor’s last day, and he says he’ll let it slide. Off they go. But they’re back in five minutes, because there’s a bit of fog and they need both headlights. In the meantime N has hurried off to VTNZ to renew his reg, and has returned. Instructor sets off with him to take his test. BF, me and M gun it to Repco to buy a new headlight. By the time N returns, it’s time for the instructor’s next test and BF has to wait half an hour.

    Halfway through BF’s test, he pulls back into the carpark. He comes over to me and M, stony faced, and informs us that the instructor pulled him over halfway through because of a scratching sound on the left side of the car, got out, KICKED both sides of the bumper, and caused it to fall off. (M’s car is a junker. But it is warranted, roadworthy, and has never had the bumper come off, that is, until this instructor saw fit to assault it). He then declared the car unfit to finish the test in.

    We ask the AA for a complaint form, which we fill out and return to the counter staff. Counter staff flat out REFUSE to fax it off to Christchurch HQ, despite not being busy and having a fax machine right behind them. No, we have to waste more of our morning, after that appalling experience, and invest more of our time and money into following this up. BF is fairly controlled, all things considered, and simply spits out “You make it impossible to complain” and we stalk out. You would think they would appreciate feedback and the opportunity to improve, but clearly their policy is to make it difficult to complain and hope that puts people off.

    BF calls up the LTNZ call centre, has a girl take down all the details, and she says he’ll get a response within three days. She says he may get a full refund. Which would be nice, even if it doesn’t make up for the time wasted. It’ll be weeks before he can get a resit. That’s how backlogged the AA are. Pity we can’t even boycott them, because nobody else does driver testing.

    Tuesday: Lugged BF’s crutches to town and around uni (well, to one lecture). Fax off complaint form to LTNZ for verification purposes (costs me a dollar and ten minutes waiting time). Bussed up to Grafton, walked across the bridge and to Auckland Hospital to return them. Lady at reception told me to leave them “by the doors where the lino starts”. Well, where the said lino started was by the lifts, and a corridor which clearly stated “staff only”. I wandered further down the wing and took a look all around to make sure I hadn’t missed anything. I also stuck my head into the “admin reception” to check there, and the receptionist told me there would be an “equipment pool” at the main reception. Trudged back there.

    Out of all the three staff, I HAD to be served by the same first lady. She snapped at me and insisted there were double doors there and I had gone “way too far”. I went back to the “start of the lino”, saw no doors, and promptly started crying. Stress, tiredness, and tiredness of everything in my life having to be so goddamn complicated. Even returning one pair of crutches.

    Thankfully, a security guard and a female volunteer took pity on me. The guard told me to leave the crutches by the lifts, and the woman had a little chat to me as I blew my nose, tried to dry my eyes and straighten my skirt. Then back to the reception with my receipt for my $35 refund. GOT THE SAME GODDAMN LADY again. She directed me round to the cashier around the corner….who refused to help me and insisted I had to go back to ED and fill out some sort of form there. Seriously. No wonder people go on shooting sprees for less. (Jokes. Sort of)

    Trudged down to ED, on the verge of more angry tears. Amazingly, the staff there were really nice. I filled out a form, and after a brief explanation of the situation to the puzzled girl I offered to go and try retrieve the crutches from where they were. Luckily, they were where I’d left them, and I signed that form and was told to expect a check in the mail. Well, all right then.

    After a full day, went to a pub quiz at the Horse and Trap (great atmosphere, pity the place is always packed, but we’ve been lucky enough to get a table every time as someone leaves right before the quiz starts). Started feeling weird aches in my neck, but tried to ignore them all night.

    Wednesday: Woke up feeling like the behind of a donkey. Except I had six straight hours of class starting at 8, and a test I had to sit and pass. (I aced it, BTW, 100%). I struggled through the day, feeling strange aches and pains in my neck, shoulders and back, alternate chills and flushes, whole-body numbness and that awful burning mouth feeling you get when you’re coming down with the flu. I made sure to hand in the two assignments I had due the next day, texted to say I had the death flu and wouldn’t be coming in to work, and left at 1pm to go home and pass out.

    Thursday: Awoke around 9, with the aches and pains gone, but a huge lump in my throat. Went back to sleep. Up at noon, sore throat staved off and feeling well enough to email my tutors to explain my absence. BF got the car towed to the workshop which did his clutch in December, where they said they’d have a look tomorrow and if it was in fact the clutch, then it would be under warranty still and all we’d have to pay is labour.

    Friday: No word back from the mechanics. Struggle through morning class, six hours of work, and home to dinner and bed.

  • May 15, 2009

    To a Mr Bitter from Titirangi

    I was merrily eating my lunch yesterday at work and flicking through the paper. I landed on the letters page – which is always good for a bit of a giggle – and lo! a submission entitled Recession victims!

    According to this writer, the members of the “debt embracing, profligate generation X and Y still have their jobs by and large, so their income is intact. With interest rates dropping as a result of the recession, their financial situation has improved significantly.”

    Wahey! Wow. Something I might expect to see from the mouth of an American, but here?

    I think this person is just a LITTLE out of touch. It’s Gen Yers who are (among others, although not exclusively) being laid off. Last in, first out. Unemployment is climbing, and those with less experience and fewer qualifications are more likely to be let go, and to find it much harder to secure any kind of new job.

    By no means is the income of my household intact. And sure, interest rates are dropping, but this only affects savers and mortgage holders. My savings rate has dropped like a rock and is hovering somewhere around inflation level. But you know what? Credit interest rates are exactly where they were before the recession began, if not higher. Prime does not seem to affect unsecured credit, for whatever reason. I don’t know if this is a Downunder phenomenon, and quite frankly I don’t care to find out. I just know that’s the way it is.

    So please, KL Matthews, don’t tell me that my financial situation has improved significantly. And don’t deign to tell me that I will benefit from the recession. I’m going to find it harder to get a job after graduation, probably be taken on at a lower pay than I might have otherwise, and with fewer benefits.

    My partner may be the next spending three years out of the workforce, which we hope will pay off in the long term. If the recession hadn’t happened, odds are he would still be gainfully employed and at a decent living wage. But in the meantime, our “financial situation” has plummeted to depths I could never have imagined last year.

    Unfortunately, like many who started out with nothing, he does have debt. Debt that he was making progress on, and which has now been halted. Not huge amounts by any means. An amount that I compare to MANY other PF blogger and think well, gosh, that really is nothing. Why am I so stressed? Well, I’m stressed because even at a low level, it’s simply not serviceable for a laid-off person. I’m stressed, especially now, because we do not have a functioning car, among other myriad worries. (Great op-ed here about how the recession is hurting low socio-economic areas, btw, and some proposed solutions. I definitely don’t agree with them all but they’re fascinating! Especially about ensuring quality used cars so people can get around. I can’t stress enough how bad public transport is here. How many times have I talked about the bus service? And with the Govt. investing in the Waterview tunnel and a freaking “nationlong cycleway“, that’s not gonna be improving anytime soon. ). How long will it take to recover and get back on top? Neither of us knows. We’re both living in a state of constant uncertainty. I wouldn’t wish it on anyone, not even you, Mr Bitter. Please remove the lemon from your mouth – you’re not the only one unhappy with the way things are, trust me.

  • May 9, 2009

    I need to take a chill pill

    Or at least that’s the conclusion I’ve reached.

    What’s that saying: God give me the grace to accept what I cannot change, the courage to change the things I can and the wisdom to do both?

    Last night BF and I had a major clash. Well, I don’t know what to call it. It wasn’t a fight. I can’t fight. I don’t do fights. Well, I do in the sense that I sometimes get snippy and short, like last night, and snap at him. But that was just the beginning.

    I’ve been under heaps of stress, mainly financial, plus all the house issues – no hot water, getting the windows fixed (THREE TIMES now glaziers have been meant to come and it hasn’t happened! Apparently the guy today came but left because he thought no one was home – he’s returning on Monday. Neither BF or I are home, so we have to rely on our flatmates for this), the car, and now our toilet flush is broken. I swear. When does it end???

    Then it all kind of blew up.

    I know I’ve been neglecting BF, and just trying to keep us fed, clothed, paying our bills and ticking along. I realise that the last few months haven’t been easy on BF either, but I haven’t really tried to get him to talk about it or anything.

    I’ve been unable to really see past myself and all our immediate practical problems. I knew I was being selfish, but I couldn’t seem to help myself.

    I think I’m much more “male” in that sense. I can’t voice my feelings, I get confused about what they are, I don’t like talking about them.

    He really made me realise how absorbed I’ve become with personal finance and money, and not in a good way. Although I’m not quite in agreement with his sentiment (“Even if I knew we’d be living out of a car when we’re 60, I wouldn’t care as long as we’re together”) I think he’s right. I need to back off.

    Maybe if we’re more on track by the end of year, we can still go on a short holiday. If we could manage to pay for say 80% in cash and knew we could pay the rest off quickly, maybe that wouldn’t be the end of the world.

    Every cell in my body is screaming NOOOO! But it’s true, I need more balance. BF pointed out I never spend anything on myself.  No, it would not be the end of the world if I went into a little debt this year because it’s my last year as a student. And it may yet happen whether I like it or not. And, as a student with good credit, I can get interest free overdrafts.It’s not that I am opposed to debt; I’m opposed to bad, stupid debt. But it’s about finding balance, and if debt is necessary, ensuring it is at a serviceable level. That’s what I need to get into his head, especially given the economy.

  • May 4, 2009

    I do NOT like

    – People who use “rape” and “raping” as a verb to refer to something other than the actual act. IE, “raping your car”. Especially when it comes from a girl. Yeah, double standards at play, but when females throw “rape” around, well, it just seems wrong. If we can’t take rape seriously, how can anyone?

    – Chicks who get drunk and come on to your BF. Once, okay. Twice or more….. well, I’ve tried, and I really want to like you, but this ain’t a friendship and it’s not gonna work. Keep it in your pants.

    – People who lash out and blame others for their own fuckups, and get abusive. Take some responsibility for yourself.

  • May 3, 2009

    Car troubles and badly cut pizza

    Just because I use a coupon……doesn’t mean it’s cool to slack off on cutting up my pizza giving me 5 massive slices and 3 minuscule ones!

    I’m sure pizza places have a secret policy for coupon users – be as sloppy as possible, and make their pizzas smaller than they should be.

    Not that I can complain, seeing as I got a free pizza, and pizza is pizza. dafazios_pizza

    What did freak me out a little was when I gave my order over the phone, and my contact number. And somehow the girl on the other end of the phone knew my name! They must keep all customers’ details on file, like, FOREVER, because the last time I phoned to order pizza was probably over a year ago.

    BF isn’t a big pizza fan, so we hardly ever go to Pizza Hut or Dominos. He likes making his own at home.

    So we went to get in the car to pick them up (yes, I’m too cheap to get food delivered. Done it ONCE, was horrified at the surcharge and refused to ever do it again), and didn’t get out of the driveway.

    BLOODY EFFING CARS.

    Either the clutch or transmission is out. And obviously we can’t even take it to a mechanic, even if it was in the budget.

    nz01008_sm

    This comes as we have about four loads of washing to do, no food in the house, and I have several things to do out and about. Not to mention that we put in $45 of gas, which would have lasted 2, maybe 3 weeks.

    Deja vu…..the last 2-3 times our car’s conked out, it’s done so with a lot of gas in it.

    FML.

  • May 2, 2009

    It’s never enough

    I don’t mean to sound ungrateful in any way, especially after how hard BF’s had to fight to get a fair shot with WINZ. I’m really thankful he’s finally been approved and is able to draw unemployment. As little as it is, it is more than I expected him to end up being eligible for, what with all their crazy criteria.

    But together we’re making just under one full-time wage, and the longer this goes on the harder it gets. For one, rent goes out on a Thursday. I get my student allowance on Tuesday night, and rent from one of the flatmates at the same time. But I get paid from work on a Friday, and BF now gets paid on a Thursday into his account, so there’s no way that can make it over to me in time. Cue juggling around of money around every Wednesday evening. God forbid I ever forget.

    Wouldn’t it be easier to keep a big buffer in the account? Yes, but that’s not something I want to do. I work a zero based budget. When I first started out on my own I was used to having a cushion of a couple hundred in my daily account. Then I moved and started paying rent fortnightly, and I ended up not having any cushion – and I actually quite liked it that way. Now I’ve adopted the zero based budget, and it works for me. I know how easy it is to inadvertently spend, and I don’t want to wonder where the hell hundreds of dollars went so fast. I already kind of did that this week, transferring over $300 in anticipation of the glazier coming to fix our two broken windows. Bastard still hasn’t shown up since quoting us.

    Grrr, NOT feeling on top of it at the moment.

    Throw in the fact that I am more or less supporting BF for the foreseeable future, especially once he starts uni, and it’s pretty depressing. I don’t want to be doing that for three years, so let’s hope he can get himself a decent part time job over that time. And something for the rest of this year. I haven’t done the maths, but even 20 hours a week at minimum would be more than what he’s making now.

  • April 19, 2009

    Thoughts on a Sunday night

    There have been a lot of op-eds and columns about how 20somethings are being hit hardest by the recession. Last in, first out. Brought up with the idea that if you just worked hard you could get ahead. Thinking you should get a degree, find a job, buy a house. And how that’s just not true, and it’s all falling apart.

    I’m just glad we don’t have a mortgage.

    I know once we get through this, nothing will ever be the same again. I won’t take anything for granted. I’m going to be even more cautious than I was before. Nothing is for certain. Nothing is safe, nothing is assured, and it can all be taken away from you in an instant. Corps have no loyalty to you. All you can do is look out for yourself, be prepared for anything and pick yourself back up.

    I feel stressed a lot, and I freaked out today at the butcher’s because we had to keep it to $20 or less to stay under budget.

    It’s not like my card would have been declined or anything, but it would have been money we didn’t have.

    We got in at $21, and BF came up with a $5 bill from nowhere.

    “See? Now we’re UNDER budget,” he told me.

    Bless him.

    Please, let Work and Income DO something. DO their jobs and give him what he’s entitled to. $10. $25. $50. Whatever.Any little bit would help, and keep us afloat for longer. $100 would be gold. That’s about how much we’re falling short by.

    If this is being a grown up, REALLY realising that the only person with your best interests at heart is YOU….I don’t like it.

    As long as we can get through this.

    One step at a time.

  • March 31, 2009

    So this morning I went to a special morning tea to meet with my ‘scholarship support person’, along with a bunch of other scholarship recipients.

    It wasn’t much use to me and the other third years, as we’ve been through it all, don’t have any questions or concerns to raise and frankly are about to graduate. We don’t need to worry about grade averages. We’re in our last year and won’t be back next year, or if we are, our scholarship will be over anyway! This would have been much more helpful earlier on, however. I’m sure the younger students will appreciate it.

    Mainly, we went for the promise of a free morning tea.

    I was envisioning something like this…

    tea1

    or this….

    tea2or …

    tea3

    or even this…

    tea4

    NO SUCH LUCK.

    What a waste of time.

    Apparently nobody came to the first session yesterday, for which she had gone out and bought a ton of food. So today, all we got was a three litre of Just Juice (and plastic cups) and two plates of plain choc chip cookies. They weren’t even very good. They were OKAY, but nothing spectacular.

    We did get to talking about summer school and going on exchange, though. Summer school’s a tricky one. A friend got burned by the office – she took a compulsory third year paper in summer school to get ahead. She would have had to do it anyway in first semester, she just took it over the summer instead. Scholarship staff didn’t care. They flat out refused to pay for that paper for her.

    Apparently they continue to pay your fees if you go on exchange, though. Here the policy is you generally go second semester of your second year. I’ve missed out, obviously.

    But do I regret it? No.

    Why didn’t I go overseas? Honestly, none of the universities on offer really appealed to me. But I’ll go through my main reasons here.

    1. The financial aspect. Sure your fees are paid, but living costs are not cheap anywhere, really. I just don’t have that kind of money saved to support me through an entire semester abroad. Yes there are other scholarships and grants, and the enterprising girl who spoke today wangled sponsorship from House of Travel, but realistically you’re going to need to cover some, if not most or all of your expenses yourself. Food, board, insurance, passports and visas, souvenirs, and of course travelling around wherever it is you are. I’m not ready for that.

    2. I’m not super keen to leave BF. Plus, breaking my lease would be a bitch. Wouldn’t want to leave him paying for two. It’s not that I doubt our relationship; after all he spent six months in the army and we’d only had two months together before that. It’s just not something I would choose to do. I do want to travel, but I’d rather do it while working (not studying) and I’d like to do it with him.

    3. My job. I have a good job, and it’s in the field I want to work in. Why would I give that up?

    If I happened to be single, I might have given the matter more thought. I still don’t think I would have made a different choice, though. I think my decision to stay in NZ was good. I don’t feel quite ready to travel and although I’m getting the itch I think postponing it and travelling later will pay off.. I’ll get much more out of the experience.

    And to think I once planned to go on my OE straight out of school! What a colossal mistake that woulda been! I’m mature, but not that mature. I know my way around Auckland. But put me somewhere else and I don’t know if I could stand on my own two feet. I’d probably even have struggled if I went to uni in a different city….but I wouldn’t have, because nowhere else does this degree like they do here.

  • March 17, 2009

    I get really torn between the two sides when it comes to welfare. On the one hand, I totally agree that people who don’t deserve it shouldn’t get it. People who show no sense of responsibility whatsoever. But 99% of the time there are kids involved. And why should the children suffer? There’s a whole other problem, the cycle of poverty. But then…that pretty much ensures the problem’s never fixed, and we continue to have the same issues generation after generation.

    What’s the solution?

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